Today I took care of my first peds patient... it was a 2 year old admitted for respiratory infections, her parents were there with her and of course she was not happy about being there, but I think the hardest part was that she was miserable because of her lack of ability to breath.
We have spent soooo much time in and out of the hospital with Jaya, and I thought I could handle taking care of a peds pt but as I left her room it all hit me and all the memories, which are still right there, came flooding back...I just saw the fear in the parents eyes, the look that says what is going to happen to my baby. I know that look, I have had that look and on some days I still do.
Being in peds or NICU (which is where I want to eventually end up) is very hard, you have to do things that may make kids cry or even parents, but in order for them to get better you have to do it!
I have to learn to put my feelings aside, stop being a mom, play the role of student nurse and do what is best for the pt, even though it is heartbreaking.
I will have the same pt tomorrow and hopefully she will be feeling better and the day will be a little bit easier.
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